2005-03-23

Huey, Louie, and Mountain Dewey

My plan to reduce my daily consumption of Mountain Dew is proceeding as planned. I have established a baseline and as soon as the Pepsi/iTunes promotion is over, I'll start the reduction. Today, I tried something a little different. I replaced this Dew drinker's regular Dew with Diet Dew. Let's see if he notices. Hell yes I noticed. I honestly can't remember if I have ever drank a full Diet Dew. Today I did and it was not a good experience. That stuff is bottled ass! I swear I had the exact same taste in my mouth as when I leave the dentist, and that's not a good thing. I even had to add a third bottle for the day just to cleanse myself of the purgatory that is Diet Dew. Diet Don't!

So, the obligatory idea of the day. Pepsi comes in a full range of sugar pain. You start with the high octane regular, then the Pepsi Edge, then the Pepsi One, and then the Diet Pepsi. You truly do get to pick your poison. Dew drinkers have no such luxury. You either get the full caloric goodness or you get to drink spider spit. Where is my Mountain Dew Halfpipe? They make Dew in regular, Cherry, Orange, Grape, and some bastard creation, Baja Ass, they only sell at Taco Bell. Where's the reduced calorie, but non-sucky version? I smell an Apprentice episode!

2 comments:

Jason said...

Hell Yeah!

I think you're turning into a bigger Mountain Dew fan than I am even. I didn't know if that was possible.

I'm still going to try to reduce to only one Dew a day, and do water the rest of the time. Water sucks! It really, really sucks!

It sucks trying to eat and drink healthy.

-- I said...

The problem with soda (either diet or regular), is once you switch to the other, you forget what the first one really tastes like. I've been drinking diet for quite a while now, and whenever drive through people screw up and give me regular, I'm stuck with the same 'dentist office' taste.

The mind is a weird thing, with all the tricks it can play on you.

-- I